


Opening Stitched Wounds

by izzylerd (orphan_account)



Category: USWNT - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-04-18
Packaged: 2018-06-02 23:58:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6588580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/izzylerd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex breaks the news to Tobin, and she's heartbroken. They're separated by seven months, 3,000 miles, and two different teams. Tobins heart is broken, and she has to face Alex for the first NWSL game of the year.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Opening Stitched Wounds

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know what to call this. Heartbreaking? Angsty? But it gets better? 
> 
> Hell yeah to Portland for winning though! So, in honor (?) of Portlands win here's this absolutely horrid one shot AU! (even though I was gonna post it if Pride won too)

She told you it was gonna be fine. That it would all work out, it's only a couple hours difference. But it was like a hundreds worlds distance to you, you couldn't bring yourself to tell her but you loved her. Love her. 

It was a couple months before the start of the NWSL season started. She told you she was moving to Orlando, that it was a big chance for her soccer career to change. But she didn't need a change, she was already one of the top players of the world. You tried to understand, you really did, but your heart broke so much that day you don't think you'll ever come back from it. 

She meant so much to you, and you feel like she just threw it all away. You understand her love for soccer, but she always told you that you came first, that she would never choose soccer over you. And you guess that's why it's hurting so much, because she lied and now your apartment feels so empty and it seems to do nothing but rain in Portland now. 

Kling noticed it, Lindsey noticed it, and Allie definitely noticed how sad you got. You wished you hadn't gotten sad but you did, she just meant so much to you that you can't really help it. 

It's been seven months since she got moved, and since then you've been forced to see her through the national team. It was awkward really, everyone knew you were hurting and everyone knew why. Jill knew she was going to have to put you with someone else for you to concentrate, and it was selfish of you to be happy when she got a hip injury and couldn't play. 

Christen was there for you though. You started drifting more towards her and a couple people seemed to notice it. You two were attached at the hip up until the Colombia game, right before the NWSL season started. You started hanging out with her more, you played chess together, went to families houses together. Hell, you two were almost the only ones on the bus back to the hotel. But then she climbed on and you couldn't help but stare, and when she locked eyes with you your entire body melted. And then she gave Christen the scariest glare you've ever seen, but you both tried to ignore it. It was hard to, you could practically feel how tense she was from the back of the bus. Lucky for you it was the last game before you had to be back in Portland, but that also meant saying goodbye to Christen. 

It was kind of hard, but you could see Allie back in Portland and that's all that mattered. You and Lindsey were getting closer, and Kling was starting to grow on you too. But they all remind you of her, soccer reminds you of her, the empty feeling you get when your apartment is dark and half empty reminds you of her. She was everywhere, she is everywhere. And it's a shame the first actual game of the season is against her. 

////

You promised coach that it wouldn't affect your playing, that everything was fine. And it was, you and Kling made great connections and Allie was always there for your crosses. But you grew anxious the day Pride landed in Portland. You knew they were going to train over at Nike, that you weren't going to have to be anywhere near them until they started piling into the stadium. 

God, you were so nervous. You didn't want to face her. You didn't want to think of her, you were so tired of thinking about her. Allie could tell that there was a heavy weight on your shoulders, that this day meant everything. You were going to have to see her, shake her hand, probably bump into her a couple times on the pitch. You had a lot of pent up anger and you decided you were going to use it tonight to your advantage. 

"Are you gonna be okay Tobs?" Lindsey asks you when you start pacing the locker room.   
"No", your voice cracks, but you don't let any of the tears out.   
"Coach is gonna be really upset if this affects your playing, are sure you can start tonight?"   
"I promised it wouldn't", you don't mean to sound so angry, but it just comes out like that. 

You give an apologetic look to Lindsey and she nods knowingly, turning back to her locker. You look around the room, your eyes falling on her old locker. Where her jersey would hang, where she would put on her pink prewrap, where you'd kiss her good luck and run onto the pitch together. It's ridiculous how much she's affecting your life. You hate everything about it, but you have to shake it off once coach comes in and says it's time to warm up. 

////

You try not to look when they walk out, you try your hardest but you fail. You watch her roll her neck and close her eyes, and when she opens them back up she's looking at you. 

Your eyes linger on her, how she's managed to gain even more muscle and mature, how her hair is already getting longer. You can see the blue in her eyes from where you stand, it breaks your heart so you look away and start passing the ball back to Allie. 

Allie gives you a look and red hot anger burns in your throat, "I'm fine" 

////

It's two minutes until game time, you've shaken hands with the starters and you tried to shake off the sparks that her touch sent through you. You didn't say good game to her, and she didn't say good game to you. You just tapped hands and looked different ways. And then Ash came up and you got happy again, you were glad to see her. It'd been a while since you'd last seen your surfing buddy, ever since Jill decided to keep her off the Olympic roster. You were upset when that happened too, Ashlyn worked so hard to be on the National Team but it wasn't good enough for Jill. Ash told you it was fine, that she'd work harder next time but you could tell she was hurting. And with her and Ali on break, you know she's holding in a lot of emotions. 

You don't realize how much time you've spent thinking until the ref blows the whistle and you watch Alex barrel down the field already. You notice her game is slightly off, she takes a hard touch and your team sends right up the field where Monica settles it. You can tell this is gonna be a really long game. 

////

It's ten minutes until half time, you're drenched in sweat and you've collided with her twice. No one has scored yet, even though all of your crosses have been perfect and your corners have been spot on, it's not good enough for the team. 

You watch her come down the field, she passed all of the midfielders already and you think this is when she's going to score but you yell out to your defenders and you watch her trip up. You're confused for a moment, mostly because she never trips up on the field and she actually trips. Over her own feet, coincidentally after you yelled. You internally smirk, now knowing you have an advantage over her. 

////

They manage to get the ball in the net. It hit off the ground right at the wrong moment and Betos couldn't get it, you feel like an idiot. You can't count how many times you've already been fouled and it hasn't get called, and you don't want to get started on how you got megged and pulled that girl down. Not one of your shining moments. 

////

Lindsey gets the ball on a free kick and she sends it towards the box. It supposed to go Nadim but it bounces off her foot right towards you. As quick as you can you get it towards the box and Brynjarsdottir gets it at her feet. You watch it, almost like everything is in slow motion as she taps it straight into the back of the net. Your eyes blow wide, your arms raising up and you run towards her into her arms. You cheer with her, Allie and Kling coming up next and engulfing both of you in a group hug. Pride seems to be hanging their heads a bit, well, she seems to and you kind of feel bad. But then you remember you have a game to win and you shake off the feeling of guilt as the ref blows the whistle for half time. 

////

When you're in the locker room you contemplate everything you've done so far. You've got one assist down, that's good, but your team is starting to notice how distracted you are. It's hard seeing her, God is it hard, but you know it shouldn't affect how you play. You have the captain armband for a reason, you can't let your team down now with a tie in place. 

////

You walk back onto the field with your head up high, not even looking in the direction of Pride. You feel her eyes on you, you always know when she's looking at you. It's like burning a hole in a leaf with a magnifying glass. You can feel it as you warm back up with Allie, and by Allies side glances you can tell she's still staring at you. 

"Tobin she hasn't stopped looking at you since you walked on the pitch again", Allie whispers to you.   
"How is she looking at me"  
"Like she's a lost puppy and you're her owner"  
"She's just trying to get to me"  
"Are you sure you couldn't have made it work?"  
"She lied", you snap a little louder than you should have, you're sure she heard you, "She lied and put soccer before me"  
"Soccer is her life though"  
"Can we just focus?" You snap again. 

You chance one look over at her, and she's looking straight at you with the biggest frown you've ever seen on her face. 

////

You assist another goal, right to Lindsey and you're so proud of her you can't bring yourself to think about her behind you. She jumps into your arms, practically the entire team following because you know you've won by now. It's already over, but you still fight like you're down two. 

////

You go into stoppage time, you get pulled off the field and forget to take the armband off in the process, but no one seems to notice. You're down on the Prides side of the field when the ref blows the whistle, ending the game. The crowds cheers deafening, it brings a real smile to your face. You take your victory lap around the field with Allie, ignoring how she's taking her sweat time at the bench. When you get back she's there waiting for you, her head hanging low. 

Your team watches you walk up to her, confused by it. 

"And here the two captains are about to have a quick conversation with each other", you hear the announcer say over the speakers. 

"Good game Morgan", you say sternly, reaching out your hand to shake hers.   
Her eyes widen slightly at your hand, and she slowly takes it into hers and you try so hard to ignore the sparks and you know she is too, "You too, Captain Heath. You played well, you deserved it"  
You smile politely and you're about to pull away but her grip tightens on you and she lightly pulls you towards her. Your heart beat picks up so fast it scares you.  
"Listen, Tobin-"  
"Can we not do this here-"

"Tobin looking a little upset by the conversation, I can only imagine what they're talking about"

"No. Listen to me", her sternness shuts you up, "I lied to you, unintentionally might I add, and I know you don't like being lied to. I hurt you, I know I did and there aren't enough apologies in the world for me to give to you. I love you and-"  
"Alex", you choke out but she stops you again.   
"Just let me finish", she sighs and you're blown so completely out of proportion you don't know if you can handle anything she's about to say, "I love you. I do. I thought this new team was going to be a new opportunity, that it'd open up a new world but all its done is shut me out. I have done nothing, absolutely nothing, but miss you these past seven months. And seeing how much I hurt you has hurt me. I fucked up Tobin, I know I did. But we were best friend before we were ever lovers so, if you haven't already found a new best friend I'd like to gain your trust and my best friend title back"

"I don't exactly read lips but I believe Alex Morgan is apologizing for something, Tobin doesn't seem very satisfied and I am very curious as to what has been going on between the two captains the past few months"

You don't know what to say. You're stunned. Completely and utterly stunned because Alex fucking Morgan loves you and she's admitting she fucked up. You can't forgive her though, not for what she did or how she did it. But part of your faith is willing to forgive people for what they've done. You love Alex, you love her with everything you have and you hate that she got to say it first. 

There's tears rolling down your cheeks and the fans are probably starting to notice so you laugh, "I don't wanna be your best friend"  
Alex's face falls even more, you watch her gulp and take a deep breath, "Okay, if that's what you want. I'll see you at the next national camp-"

You roll your eyes and smile as Alex turns away, her grip starting to loosen but you just pull her back into your arms until both of your foreheads are touching. 

"I want to be your girlfriend you idiot", you whisper.   
"Jesus Tobin, you really know how to give a girl a heart attack", she manages breathes out. 

You laugh and share one last look with her. She nods and smiles, meeting you halfway so your lips can touch and fireworks set off everywhere in your body. You can hear all of the fans screaming, both of the teams cheering and the announcers going nuts. 

"Well this is certainly a dramatic change of events, Tobin Heath and Alex Morgan seem to have been having a relationship behind the pitch. Let tell you I am completely thrown off guard by this"

"Oh for the love of everything good if they don't shut up", you groan, causing Alex to laugh.   
"So, what happens now?"   
"Well, I'm still hurt by what you did-"  
"I know and I'm so so sorry-", you place a finger on her lips.   
"I'm hurt, but shit happens to people who love each other"  
Alex is silent, one of her eyebrows slowly arching.   
"You love me?"  
You groan loudly, throwing your head back slightly, "Yes you bafoon, I've loved you for the past year! I swear you're the most oblivious person I have ever met. I love you Alexandra Morgan!"  
Alex smiles widely at you, tears now rolling down her face and she buries her head in your neck. You wrap your arms tightly around her waist, never wanting to let go of her. 

You know this isn't going to fix things. You're both on different teams now, you live on different sides of the country and the only thing that's keeping you physically together is the national team. You're going to have to work hard for Alex, and Alex is going to have to work even harder for you. But all you can think about as you wrap your arm around her waist, is that it's all worth it for her.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope I ripped your heart out and stitched it back up enough in this.


End file.
